Hare Davena--widely regarded as the band's spiritual leader but
a metaphysical lightweight. The only member of the band not to have a cool
nickname. Currently holding auditions for a Hardcore Stripper Rap Group.
L. Mulligatawny Vindaloo--widely regarded to be the most out
there of the Krishnas, Vindaloo is at least six levels of enlightenment
beyond the next closest member of the Hairies. Currently shooting for Level
45.
Tastyee Papad--widely regarded to be the thinker of the group
and its premier lyricist. Retired with his concubine.
Moshe Weineritz--widely regarded to be the most Jewish member
of the group. Was brought on board to bring a sense of rhythym to the band
and to appeal to the rapidly growing Orthodox Hare Krishna populations.
Currently working the wall with an M-16 and tambourine at Ben Guiron Airport,
Tel Aviv.
Hare Chrishna--widely regarded to have hogged the mike by his
fellow bandmates, Chrishna was a separate but equal member of the Hairies.
Took his act on with a new band, Harries II Men, which tries to appeal
to a wider audience.
Tanja DobbelDee--widely regarded to be the silent member of
the band, was kicked out for not being obnoxious enough in the airport.
Currently "working" in Amsterdam.
RosenBlu --widely regarded to be the most unknown member of
the band to almost all the rest of its members, RosenBlu would emerge from
seclusion only to lay down some monstrous bass during live performances.
Whereabouts are unknown.
1. There was a rift in the band between members who wanted to remain
hardcore to Krishna principles and those who sought a wider audience.
2. Weineritz and Vindaloo got in an argument of who deserved to deny
themselves of more royalty money.
3. After living together for a combined total of 547 lifetimes, the
band was more of a strain than the friends could handle.
4. Tanja DobbelDee may have been exerting a Yoko Ono-like influence
over one of the members of the band.
5. The band didn't feel that the rhythym was right on RosenBlu's beat
for their new hit single "Set Myself on Fire".
6. There were concerns of plagarism from Frank Zappa's, "He Used to
Cut the Grass" and XTC's "Dear God". Why this should be a concernt to rap
musicians, who are essentially talentless thieves anyway, is completely
beyond us.
7. The Seinfeld Effect: Get out while the getting is good, and besides,
now that Seinfeld is off the air, Lives just aren't worth living.